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Felix Azure

Magisch Verbond
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Felix Azure last won the day on December 23 2019

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About Felix Azure

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    Wraaaah... in French

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  1. [1838/1839]The eye of the beholder

    Felix glimlachte warm naar zijn vriend. “Ik ben niet verbaasd, hoor. Wat jij doet… ’t is redelijk universeel, denk ik.” Omdat het prachtige, emotionele schilderijen waren, omdat iedereen zich er wel iets bij kon voorstellen maar niemand het na zou kunnen doen. Dat was het soort van kunst waar iedereen van kon houden, niet alleen mensen die wisten wat het prijskaartje was dat eraan hing en dat nog eens zouden kunnen betalen ook. Hij had nog vaak genoeg, af en toe, in musea moeten werken, en voor wat van de minder universele kunstenaars soms zelfs bewaking moeten zijn, dus hij had ook een beeld bij iets waar iedereen wel kritiek op zouden kunnen hebben. En dit was het niet. “Oh, maar niet de potloden geven,” lachte hij vervolgens, en hij keek even naar Debora. Hij had ze namelijk al gekocht. Hij was hier helemaal niet zo goed in, maar cadeautjes geven kon hij net voor elkaar krijgen. Hij lachte. “Ja hoor. Past helemaal. En als ik die familie een beetje ken, kletsen ze er moeiteloos omheen.” Hij nam een handje van Deb, een hand van Mat en Verdwijnselde hen beiden terug naar het bekende huisje, waar Romeo beledigd van de bank viel. “Wil je nog iets drinken, Deb, of al naar bed?” vroeg hij vervolgens. “Ik blijf nog wel even.” En hij ging Romeo’s waterbakje bijvullen als peace offering.
  2. [EN]In which there is a forced blind date

    “It was pretty relaxed,” he nodded, because to him it had been – and to a certain extent, this was always going to be a relating of personal events and experiences, wasn’t it? There had been the same or similar excesses back there of course as there were here, there had been the far too many parties with far too much alcohol flowing far too freely and he was reasonably certain there had been some unintended consequences, probably some unwanted or poorly timed pregnancies as well but they hadn’t been among his group of friends and he’d rarely concerned himself with gossip. Probably quite a few of the unlucky girls had been taken away from school as well, anyway and he wouldn’t have noticed that. He hadn’t been paying close attention, especially those last two years… He had another large sip to wash the memories away. The Auror Academy and female instructors. Yes, that was what they’d been talking about. “Yeah, you’re right,” he agreed. “You should have a look in sometime.” That wasn’t the way he would normally put it, he would never tell anyone what to do in such a manner, but… a lot of nevers were happening at the moment. How peculiar. Anyway, it wasn’t bad advice, she could make a difference there. “Oh, no reason, really,” he answered with a shrug. “Just curious. I don’t know if I’d ever do it… It’s still another person you have to fit into your life, right and it’s so very likely that it would be a terrible regret.” He reflected on that and added honestly: “Definitely for the girl. And divorce is still pretty much not done, right? Or is that different in Britain?” Mat hadn’t done it, but then, Mat was Mat. Felix wouldn’t draw what was a normal relationship from his boyfriend’s experiences. For oh so many reasons.
  3. [1838/1839] I dug up all your little secrets

    Okay, misschien was Felix niet helemaaaaal comfortabel met het binnenrennen van een slaapzaal vol nu inmiddels niet langer slapende jongens en misschien was dat absoluut niet wat hij met zijn opmerking had bedoeld. Hallo, privacy, ehm, propriëteit, hallo boze ouders, hallo onrustig geweten. Maar ja, hij was minder comfortabel met zijn andere drie opties op het moment, namelijk a. Eagle uitleggen waarom hij hier een bezwaar tegen had, wat hij vast niet kon doen op een manier die niet tot verdere vragen zou leiden, die hij vast niet kon beantwoorden op een manier waar hij niet gek van zou worden, enfin, b. Eagle in zijn eentje een slaapkamer vol nu niet langer slapende jongens binnen laten stormen (hij had op zich niets tegen Eagle, heus niet, geen reden om hem niet te vertrouwen maar Felix werkte niet zo, hij had ook geen reden om hem wel te vertrouwen en dat was toch eigenlijk wel wat hij nodig had) of c, Eagle vervloeken nu hij zijn rug naar Felix had en meer bezig was met de trap. Dat zou vast ook niet zonder uitleg weer weggelachen worden. Het was niet echt een optie, hoor. Felix was gewoon een bodyguard en als zodanig altijd grondig in de analyse. Sommige mensen zouden zeggen dat de optie ‘zelf serieus letsel oplopen’ ook ex ante geen echte optie was, en die mensen waren niet geschikt voor Felix’ specialiteit. Goed, hij ging dus mee naar boven en vervolgens was Eagle al aan het bulderen. Strafwerk voor een beetje vuurwerk? Dat ging wel ver hoor. “Ik doe het wel,” bood hij aan. Dan kon hij ze een lesje veilig vuurwerk afsteken geven en werd er nog goed gebruik gemaakt van de tijd en het vuurwerk. Ondertussen zocht hij ook maar. “Ah, hallo, juffrouw. We controleren de leerlingenkamers even op verboden goederen...” Hij vond zelf onder een plank onder het bed twee gigantische flessen whisky, kwam weer overeind. “Zoals dit, bijvoorbeeld, dit kan echt niet in de slaapzaal van de derdejaars.” Bij de vijfde had hij het misschien laten liggen... anders was hij wel heel hypocriet geweest. Maar misschien was dat een vereiste voor goed leraarschap
  4. [EN]In which there is a forced blind date

    Well, the drinking game was picking up the pace again and that even though Felix naturally was not privy to Avery’s thoughts, and so had to contend with only the curses that made it out of her mouth - probably a good thing, because otherwise, at this rate, he would have been comatose in half an hour. He did wonder, incidentally, about the rant at his gender somewhat. Was he included in ‘men’? He would rather assume so. How about ‘them’? Or were they implicitly making a distinction between men that thought women should remain confined to the kitchen unless they were bringing out dinner and men that for some reason didn’t think so? (Felix clearly didn’t think so. He had no opinions on kitchens. He mostly had a vague notion that he had better stay out of them unless supervised. He was a hazardous cook and until he’d met Mat he’d never seen an onion.) “No, for us Ilvermorny was a lot more relaxed, I think,” he said with a small smile. That had been the reason he’d asked. He’d experienced school as quite the island, another culture by itself, he’d wondered how far the talons of British high society stretched within Hogwarts. “Dating was fine... and girls were supposed to do every bit as well as guys in everything, as far as I know.” He sipped from his wine again and reflected. “Although for an exact comparison you might be better off asking a girl. I think half this stuff I probably wouldn’t even notice.” Alright, half might be underestimating himself. He always paid attention, especially now. “How about the Auror academy, then? I thought they were actively looking for female instructors as well... is it better in our office?” He wouldn’t usually ask questions like this. Not point blank. But he was actually dimly enjoying an interesting conversation. And hey, he was probably learning, right? Was doing his level best to find out about discrimination that would not affect a very white, very well educated man. Who was ostensibly straight, anyway, otherwise he’d have been able to get some hands on experience. “Would you marry someone if you were positive that they were okay with all of that? If they’d find it perfectly fine that you worked and at this job even?”
  5. [EN]In which there is a forced blind date

    “Yeah, true. I mean, there’s some…” But he could count the amount of happily married female Aurors with kids on one hand. Possibly while entirely engrossed in a duel, even. “It’s probably more difficult if you’re expected to have kids.” Even Felix could understand that. Gender neutral only went so far, even for him, and he wasn’t about to deny the harsh rules of nature which dictated that if you were the one actually physically having kids, you were going to be taken off of field duty a hell of a lot sooner than if your wife happened to be pregnant. If you added in time for you know, having the kid and somehow figuring out how your life still existed after, and then if you had another one or God forbid even two, that was going to seriously derail your career. Even if no one wanted it to and everyone was as flexible as they could possibly be. And then there was the danger to you after you had kids, and… Felix was never getting married, just in case you were wondering. “Would be nice, wouldn’t it? If there was something to be done about stuffy people.” He had another sip. “If we could just tell them: look, my opinion is as good as yours and incidentally, mine doesn’t stop you from doing anything you want to do, whereas yours consists of stopping other people from what they want to do. But that wouldn’t really fit into the manual, no.” He smiled half-heartedly. He laughed when she cursed. “I’ll get the next round…” Because he was still playing the drinking game. Ish. He was just drinking all the time, now, really. Whatever, he was off tomorrow. “What’s it like at Hogwarts, actually?" he asked, putting once more full glasses in front of them. "Same amount of stuffiness?”
  6. [EN]In which there is a forced blind date

    “No, exactly,” Felix agreed, with a wry chuckle. “Some long-suffering partner that would be okay with that. I couldn’t do that to them.” And in his experience, people didn’t notice if you didn’t use any terms specific for either gender, so long as you didn’t do it too often, especially in this kind of conversation. After all, he was talking about the pair of them. He couldn’t be specific. He didn’t know why he did it like this. It was as much a lie as any other thing he’d actually say. But it didn’t feel that way completely, and not feeling that way completely was the best he was going to be capable of these days. He didn’t want to outright lie unless he had to. If he had to, he certainly would. There was too much at stake. “But you shouldn’t have to give your job up. There have to be some people who would be okay with that, surely? It’s nearly 1840...” He frowned. “It’s quite common where I’m from, for magical folks. Not even the Brits can be that stuffy the lot of them.” Well, that had been uncharacteristically blunt of him. He smiled half-heartedly and had a sip of wine to cover his embarrassment. He nodded, shrugged. “I’m alright with people, I guess. It’s part of the job, you know.” He grinned. “The client-facing part. Having to put people at their ease. And you meet a ton of people whether you like to or not, so...” Suddenly hungry, he ate a bit more. “Everyone Just has their own personal manual. They’re easy enough to deal with. Though not perhaps always for an extended amount of time.” Just until the job was over. Felix always stayed at the surface. He knew lots of people. But it was a mere acquaintance, even if it didn’t feel that way. “Doesn’t it get in the way when you have to take witness statements and the like?”
  7. [EN]In which there is a forced blind date

    Yes, he’d gotten personal, which Felix always strived to avoid: but avoiding it was hard, in the current context, because they’d mentioned work and he knew of no other interests of Avery’s which he would be able to fill the time with through the rest of their date. Even worse, he didn’t want to ask those questions because they were such standard date questions. They might give off the wrong impression and for both their sakes, that was really best avoided. He thanked her quietly, sipped from his wine again. “Ah, pity,” he said with a smile. “These things happen, though.” He assumed. They’d never happened to him. He supposed that was one emotional disaster he’d missed out on. Wooh! Look how nice I’ve been. No, he’d only fallen in love once and it had been the surest thing in his world. Still was. Might always be. When he pictured himself and Mat, he never pictured them splitting up. It was unimaginable. That, obviously, was not a conversational topic he could go into. Avery might have to arrest him on the spot, for one, and while Felix did not like dating, he’d never had one that had ended quite that badly. Things with Helene didn’t count. They didn’t count for Avery’s question either, so he sipped his wine and smiled. “I’m not exactly relationship material either,” which was absolutely not a lie, Mat just had strange tastes was all, “and the job gets in the way. Crazy hours, dangerous occupation, and for personal protection and undercover work sometimes you’re gone for weeks at a time, you know.” That had been the main appeal of his specialisation. “How come you dislike most people?”
  8. [EN]In which there is a forced blind date

    Yeah, you see, Ave, that would be the answer to ‘why a convict’: because they might actually be willing, on account of the whole fishing in a different pool kind of thing and the good word at the hearing which always worked wonders for minor offences. And they might not be so easily scared off. Since, you know. They were hardened criminals and all. Given Felix’s present experiences on this date, even a tough Auror, trained to withstand most types of pressure and work in extremely dangerous conditions, might not be a match for a married life with Avery Hollow. Merlin’s beard, he could recall at least two situations in which he had experienced immediate danger for his life and in which he’d been nevertheless decidedly more comfortable than at this flower-topped table in the quiet candlelit restaurant. Yes, admittedly that probably said as much about him as it did about Avery but even so. He wasn’t inclined to offer to be her stand-in colleague, in any case. “Please,” he nodded, and finished his glass, passing it to her, having abandoned his drinking game due to an abominable lack of cursing for the past one or two minutes, which on the one hand, you know, good for her and on the other, he really did want to be drinking, see. The moments where she was at the bar he took to further depress himself by picturing the quiet little scene in a Bathgate living room which this evening out with a coworker was so unjustly costing him (he liked Avery as a colleague by the way, he really did. The problem was the social requirements). Then he chuckled as he realised that there was no possible point of comparison between them, and sought again to make an effort as she returned. “So you’ve never really liked anyone?”
  9. [1838/1839][EN] Bitter sweet

    The conversation was growing positively acerbic, or at least Phoenix was, and Felix was every bit as comfortable to remain in such company as you’d expect, i.e. not even a little bit. However, he saw few other options. Having been asked to dine in this company, he assumed leaving it was not truly a choice available for the making. Maybe if there was a massive emergency at the office, but even then Thurion would probably tell him to let someone else handle it and he would probably concur. Reluctantly but even so. Because unlike Phoenix, he couldn’t do acerbic very well. He could feel it, certainly. Books could be filled with the less than charitable thoughts Felix had entertained regarding people wanting things from him. But he wouldn’t be comfortable saying it. Not anymore. At Phoenix’s age, maybe. He remembered having done it. He remembered having been assertive and having demanded things. His rights, his education, his autonomy. Even just answers. But he’d never gotten any and things had always gotten worse from there. And so he’d decided that it would be best not to talk about where the limits of his power lay. That would keep him from being everyday confronted by it. Thurion, true to form, ignored the tone in Phoenix’s voice, although Felix was sure it had not escaped his notice. He just probably didn’t feel it was warranted, and so it didn’t fit, and so he must ignore it. He would consider that easier for everyone involved. “A deadline? Heavens no. It’s just one of those things that gets a lot harder if you postpone it, in my experience. What say you, Felix?” “Oh, I don’t date much.” “You don’t date at all, which is why you’re an excellent case in point.” Thurion chuckled. “It comes from taking everything too seriously. If you don’t date around, you won’t find out what you like and don’t like until it’s way too late.” Actually, I have a pretty good idea of what I like and don’t like, why don’t we start with the gender and end with degree of bossiness. Was what he didn’t say. “The first years of a tough study programme there’s a lot of other things going on, though,” he offered. That was the most help he could give Phoenix. The rest of this fight was all for him.
  10. [1838/1839][EN]'Millie'

    “Ah yes. The case studies are always fun,” Felix was particularly happy to be able to uncontroversially agree. He figured Andy didn’t like them for the same reason he had, the reason he had being that because it was real, it felt much more educational than the fakes, you noticed the mistakes of the human criminals involved in a way you never would have realised with a faux case where everything had been thought out perfectly. It gave you the opportunity to see that where there were people involved in a particular mess, other people were usually able to figure it out just by having being a human being as their default setting. And he’d liked how there were, unlike in fake scenarios or test questions, a million different ways of going about such an assignment, all valid in principle, so long as you stuck to the same do’s and dont’s everyone did. “I helped pick a couple this year, from our recently closed pile. Did you have the one with the bridge and the stepping stones already? I won’t spoil the ending if you haven’t...” That would take the fun away. He hummed. Second year of the Auror Academy in Canada... “I really liked the internships. In Canada, you do a lot, cause people usually don’t end up working at the central Ministry, and it’s important you can function in lots of different environments. And I liked advanced concealment... Mm, cryptography, but I don’t think you’d have had that yet, it’s an elective.” Felix had picked it mainly because it had filled up Wednesday evenings and he had always enjoyed having a good reason not to be home and available of an evening. But he had never regretted it. He didn’t use it much, but it was already worth it just to have been able to pass the occasional love note slash puzzle to Mat, right? Not that he passed explicit love notes, not even in cipher. Just a way to let someone know that you were thinking about them. “What electives are you taking?”
  11. [1838/1839]The eye of the beholder

    Felix lachte, voelde nu toch ook wel lichtelijk blosjes opkomen weer bij Mats aanbod. Vervelende blosjes! Het was een van de weinige uitdrukking-gerelateerde dingen die hij nooit onder controle had kunnen krijgen en dus werd hij nog regelmatig verraden door zijn wangen, die zijn ongemak prijsgaven zelfs wanneer hij er nooit meer iets van uitdrukte in woorden. Maar met Mat was ook dat niet erg, was het niet erg dat hij ietsje meer zag. Was het een plezierig generen. Heel bizar dat dat bestond. “Dat – als je wil. Heel leuk.” Dat zou hij heel leuk vinden, met andere woorden, maar het was dan weer niet de bedoeling dat Mat zich ertoe verplicht zou voelen. Moeilijk, hoor, daten als een Felix. Andere mensen moesten dit er doorgaans beter vanaf brengen. Toch? Hij lachte zachtjes. “Nee, daar heb je denk ik wel gelijk in.” Arme Mat, een feestelijke opening was een nachtmerrie voor hem. “Maar iedereen vind het tenminste heel mooi.” Wat vast beter was dan als de helft er had van staan walgen zoals Mat zich gedroeg in sommige modernere musea – waar Felix overigens ronduit van genoot, want het was enig als daar het venijn er een beetje uitkwam. Het was bij Mat zo moeilijk om verder voor te stellen. “Hoe ze kijken als niemand kijkt… wat slim, eigenlijk.” Je zou zo’n kleurcodering nog voor z’n werk kunnen gebruiken. “Misschien kijken ze wel verdrietig of op de klok omdat zij eigenlijk allemaal ook liever naar huis zouden gaan,” grinnikte hij. Netwerken. Horror. En hoezo keek hij lief als niemand oplette? Was dat als hij Mats schilderijen stond te bekijken, want dan, oeps. Hij glimlachte toen hij diens hand op zijn rug voelde. “Wil je zo nog een rondje doen beneden? Of zal ik jullie al naar huis sneaken?”
  12. [1838/1839] I dug up all your little secrets

    “Eigenlijk niet,” gaf Felix zonder moeite toe, terwijl hij door de deur die zeer galant voor hem open werd gehouden naar binnen liep. “Huffelpuf een beetje, die lijken erg vriendelijk.” Doch niet per se getalenteerd op zijn vakgebied. Bij de introductieles voor Huffelpuffers werden er haast meer excuses geuit dan spreuken. Desondanks konden ze het waarschijnlijk allemaal wel, of evenveel als bij de andere afdelingen. Wat voorzichtiger zijn kon hij ze niet kwalijk nemen, nietwaar? Hij had collega’s uit Huffelpuf die uitstekend waren in hun baan. En hij had nog niet eens mensen van alle afdelingen gezien, dus wist hij veel. Net als op Ilvermorny zou de soep vast niet zo heet gegeten worden. Daar had je ook meer dan genoeg overlap. Uiteindelijk was iedereen toch maar weer een beetje hetzelfde, toch maar weer behoorlijk menselijk. “Welke zat jij?” Met de stereotyperingen die Eagle zelf had gemaakt, was het wel interessant waar hij zichzelf dan in zag. Hij fronste. “Goed…” Haalde even een simpele doorlichtingsspreuk door de ruimte. Weinig kans daarmee alles boven water te halen in zo’n van magie doordrongen omgeving als Zweinstein, maar het was nooit een slecht begin. Inderdaad vond hij algauw een verstopt buideltje kruiden. Hij snifte eraan. “Eh. Thee. Sterrenmunt.” Hij lachte. “Niet echt lekker, maar gevaarlijk is het niet. Mm, het meeste zal op de slaapzalen zijn ook, of niet?”
  13. [1838/1839][EN] Bitter sweet

    It was beyond question whether Felix would be willing to drag the spotlight on himself on the matter of girls. Phoenix might feel all manner of awkward about it, but Felix was hiding rather more and so he was happy to back him up by talking about his case load but certainly not willing to venture even a syllable beyond his work life. He did indulge, for himself, as he listened, the bizarre notion of telling Mr. Thurion Foulkes-Davenport about Mat, lovely, quiet, shy Mat with his shy little daughter and his cosy messy little house and as such it was a very entertaining idea because the reaction in his imagination was comical. But of course, he would never go there. And anyway, he bet that Thurion was far more interested in Phoenix anyway. “Oh, there’s nothing you need be concerned about, I’m sure,” Thurion replied kindly in the meantime, ostensibly not at all perturbed by Phoenix’s slight change in tone – that made sense, he seemed like the kind of person who would ignore all tone changes that he had not agreed to because that would be the best way to make them go away. “But with a first love, it is common perhaps to be nervous, is it not? For the very first girl you start to date? That’s why it’s best to get that out of the way before all the serious stuff comes in. Don’t you think? What do you think, Felix?” Felix wondered if Thurion had ever been nervous around girls. “Not really my area of expertise,” he therefore hedged. Thurion had no idea how much dating girls was outside of his area of expertise, huh. “But certainly. Bring someone, you’ll have some light fun. I promise I wouldn’t keep you in the country till you marry her,” Thurion went on, chuckling. “But isn’t it something that you want to do?”
  14. [1838/1839][EN]'Millie'

    He could see her pull herself together, he could recognise in her what he had done countless of times himself, when it wasn’t going well, when he wasn’t feeling well, but when he also wasn’t going to show it. He instinctively shied away from that notion, because now he was the person forcing the other person to put on that face and it felt wrong even though the situations really weren’t comparable. Even though he wasn’t forcing her at all, even though he would be fine if she was unhappy, fine if she was rude, or angry, because he would make himself deal with that again. He still felt the guilty party. So he took her to a fish and chips place that was good but also quick, he kept carrying the cat, and he would make sure that rapidly enough he would be out of her hair. He fed the cat a little piece of his fish and nodded. “Yes, they can’t not teach those basics but they’re not nearly as interesting as the second year stuff. That’s much closer to reality… at the same time, sometimes there’s still stuff from the first year you run into in the real job. Like, don’t run into an abandoned building that you don’t have control over. That’s the second week or something? And sometimes it still comes up…” He smiled quietly. “What’s the kind of thing you really like right now?” She’d never been too into his specialisations. Maybe someone else would suit her better. Maybe that would be best for them both.
  15. [1838/1839][EN]'Millie'

    It was true, of course, that people got sold and expensively. Honestly, Felix hadn’t expected Andromache to be that jaded yet. It had merely been a joke. When you made a ton of jokes to avoid awkward silences or awkward conversations sometimes the jokes would only make things worse. “Fair enough,” he therefore admitted with a small smile. “I see you’ve got that Auror optimism down pat.” He took over the cat and basket again and sighed. “I guess we’ll just run a picture in the paper. Trade it for the next scoop on an open-and-closed investigation or something.” The Daily Prophet was generally happy to help out the Aurors, but almost always wanted something in return. The great thing for Felix was that that was above his pay grade, the head of department would do his little dance around the press corps and the problem would solve itself. “You want to grab some lunch? … Fish and chips, or something?” He hummed. “How are classes going anyway?”
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